Snapping Green Beans is RDIable

When we switched to a developmental, relationship based autism intervention, I struggled to grasp concepts and implement them into daily routines. I watched a yahoo list (which no longer exists) where parents described activities. I tried to wrap my mind around the concepts while feeling unsure about what I was supposed to do.

Looking back, I realize that giving my daughter many experiences to be competent with me in very simple reciprocity and interaction, back-and-forth, turn-taking, at non-verbal levels, was key, and often, I was trying to focus over her head, developmentally speaking.

When you "program" a child for a skill without the developmentally appropriate relationship goal, you are shortchanging the child. The focus becomes "getting" the child to perform the skill instead of *giving* the child practice and experience that he/she needs. (Schools tend to shortchange children with autism, in my experience, by ignoring the developmentally appropriate relationship piece.)

When you focus on developmentally appropriate objectives within the context of an activity, you're giving the child a "two-fer" (two-for-the-price-of-one) experience.

There's a big difference between "getting" a child to do something and *giving* him/her an experience, both in the approach (delivery) and the outcome.

Yesterday, while I was preparing our Thanksgiving meal, I began to snap the ends from some fresh green beans. My girl joined me with interest, asking what, exactly, was I doing, and could she help me?

As I explained how we snap the pointy ends from the green beans before we cook them and I showed her how to snap the ends off, I gave thanks for the experiences she'd had in the past that allowed her to join me, to want to join me. My appreciation grew for child development and the marvel it is when it happens naturally, and I thought about how challenging it is for a child (and his/her parent) whose development falls off track. And I thought about the many RDIable objectives that could be experienced and practice using the simple background activity of snapping green beans.

Here are a few of them:

Being with (and limits and boundaries) - Mom snaps green beans while child stays nearby. It's an early step in sharing attention, joint attention, theory of mind - and too often, we skip this step in order to "get" something from a child. Don't discount the importance of simply "being with" in terms of making yourself a safe and trustworthy guide and , to borrow from Dr James D MacDonald, a Communicating Partner for your child.

Simultaneous parallel co-regulating roles - Both of you snap green beans together, performing the same roles at the same time

Coordinating roles - Mom snaps green beans, hands them to child to sort, ends in trash, beans in bowl. We can reverse coordinating roles, here, too, if you're working on that kind of objective

Copying Mom's actions with meaning and context - Much more, much richer than simply, "gross motor imitation", Little Bit had to watch me carefully to figure out how to snap the ends off the green beans. She wasn't holding the end tightly enough at first, and once I showed her how to pinch the end more tightly, she was quickly snapping beans with ease.

Experiencing the concept of "good enough" AND monitoring Mom for "good enough" - there's not an exact, right way to snap green beans - they're not all exactly the same length when we finish - we aim for "good enough". Sometimes, we snap off more than we intend - and that's okay, too. We're flexible. For the child, monitoring Mom's face and actions for clarity that you're actions are within the "good enough" range is important to practice and experience.

Variations are natural here. Snapping beans isn't rote. Sometimes, you find a stem or leaf. That goes in the trash. Sometimes, a bean is too small. That goes in the trash. Little Bit came across one that she said had already been chewed. It was broken at one end, already. We snapped a little bit off, threw the waste in the trash pile, and moved on to the next bean. There's more flexibility to experience.

Experiencing mistakes. Both of us messed up a few times, throwing the snapped ends into the bowl of good beans and the good bean into the trash. Oops! This was a fun opportunity to notice a breakdown in our little system, to laugh at ourselves, and make a repair.

Those are just a few ideas off the top of my head. If you think of more, please add them to the comments section.

Snapping green beans together wasn't about teaching Little Bit the "life skill" of snapping green beans. Snapping green beans became the background activity to some relationship practice and experience, and the bonus is the fact that she learned a new skill. Snapping green beans is a "two-fer". I got a big reminder (again) yesterday that finding the right game or activity isn't as important as figuring out how to use activities already in our days to couple with the right developmental objective as we give our children practice and experiences that move them forward.

Stuffed

Have you ever seen a decorative jar filled with different layers of dried beans and grains? There's a layer of red beans, a layer of white, maybe a layer of lentils or green peas, a layer of corn, etc.

That's how I feel right now after eating Thanksgiving dinner midday with leftovers for supper.

I've got a layer of turkey at the bottom, mashed potatoes, then sweet potatoes...at the top is the chocolate pudding tart...

Thanksgiving Preview

I managed to get some GFCFSF+++ baking accomplished today.

Cornbread mix came from Gluten Free Pantry (purchased on sale at Whole Foods Market last week)

Cornbread stick pan from a secret friend

Pumpkin Bread converted from my aunt's recipe

Chocolate Pudding Tart from Cybele Pascal's baking cookbook

Here's a photo preview:

"Simply covering material is not teaching...."

From Edutopia's facebook status today:

"Simply covering material is not teaching; it's checking off a list. If we focus more on getting through the curriculum than on creating meaningful and enriching educational experiences, we forget such vital parts of our job, such as checking for understanding, re-teaching, and reviewing, " blogger Rebecca Alber.

Read the entire blog entry HERE.

Sleep and Autism, Sensory Processing, ADHD, and Children

Children with autism, sensory processing disorder, adhd are sometimes very poor sleepers. They have trouble falling asleep. They don't always stay asleep. My child with autism didn't sleep through the night for five very long years, and sometimes, she still goes through periods where she has trouble sleeping. Even typically developing children can be poor sleepers.

Sleep is a big topic on groups of parents who have children with special needs. Here, in one very long blog post, are all the notes that I have taken over the years at conferences and workshops on factors that can impact sleep. I'm not the expert; I'm merely passing along the notes I've taken from professionals familiar with sleep problems.

Sleep is important to all of us. A lot of families I know use a prescription drug or OTC melatonin to help children sleep. I am bothered by this when doctors, professionals, and parents use a drug or supplement first without ruling out causes to sleep challenges first. I am even more bothered by behaviorists who view sleep troubles as "manipulation" on the part of children.

Here are some things I've been told about sleep and autism, things that are worth considering, researching, assessing for risk in your own situation with your own doctor or professional. (I am not a doctor. None of this is medical advice or professional advice of any sort. Do your own research, talk with your own doctor, make your own decisions about what you are comfortable trying with professional supervision.)

For some poor sleepers, there is not one single cause; there are multiple causes, and trying one intervention without trying a combination of interventions may be necessary. There are multiple puzzle pieces at play in some of our kids.

I have attended more autism conferences than I can count. In biomedical tracks, doctors report that milk is a big culprit in sleep issues; so is gluten. No, we don't have the science to prove it, so if you are one of those parents who wants double blind placebo studies, we don't have those. We have thousands of anecdotal reports from parents. I know many parents who told me a child began sleeping better immediately (within three days) with the complete removal of all milk products (casein). A lot of children begin to immediately sleep better on the GFCF diet. (A nutritionist can help you make sure your child is getting enough vitamins and minerals when you try the GFCF diet by analyzing a food journal. I used the services of a nutritionist at our local health department to analyze my daughter's diet after we put her on the GFCF diet.)

Soy and other foods can affect sleep, too, including dyes and preservatives (research Feingold diet). One book with a lot of information that may be helpful as you research is Doris Rapp MD's, "Is This Your Child?" Another is Kelly Dorfman's, "Cure Your Child With Food?" Here is an article by Kelly Dorfman about sleep.

A Michigan holistic MD, Rick Ng, told parents at a biomed support group meeting to make sure we get our kids out at noontime and "march 'em around in the sunlight" and to allow our homes to darken with the day, using as little artificial lighting as possible at nighttime, to allow the body to use natural sources of light and dark to set wake and sleep cycles. He told us to avoid or minimize TV, video games, computer, etc, at night, as the flickering light can fool the body into thinking it's day (and awake) time.

Some children experience burning acid reflux when they lie down and try to sleep. They are unable to tell us about the pain and burning that keeps them from falling asleep and staying asleep. For some children, reducing reflux through some dietary changes is enough to solve the problem, although you usually need some lab testing for food sensitivities to accomplish this. Find a doctor who can help rule it out or diagnose properly and treat, if needed. Don't try treatments on your own.

Yeast in the gut can contribute to sleep difficulties, and one symptom of yeast that I hear about again and again is laughter and giggling during waking in the middle of the night. Yeah, I thought it sounded crazy, too, but a) many parents report the connection and b) it makes sense to rule out yeast out as a possible factor in sleep problems when you think about the reasoning behind it. Kelly Dorfman is one of many professionals whom I've heard talk about this issue that affects sleep. Find a doctor who can help rule it out or diagnose properly and treat, if needed. Don't try treatments on your own.

Tooth pain (cavity, cutting new teeth, loose tooth), sinus and head pain, throat pain (sometimes caused by reflux; sometimes by allergies and post nasal drip; sometimes by a virus) can keep a child from sleeping. So can ear pain caused by the pressure of fluid in the ears or infection. Find a doctor who can help rule it out or diagnose properly and treat, if needed. Don't try treatments on your own.

Many parents believe that epsom salts baths just before bedtime are helpful. Research first; get your doctor's okay. Magnesium can affect the heart; that's why you want to include the doctor in this decision. Susan Owens and Rosemary Waring are two names to begin your research. (Don't try epsom salts baths without researching them and clearing es baths with your doctor(s). I am not a doctor; this is not medical advice. Find a doctor who can help diagnose properly and treat, if needed. Don't try treatments on your own.)

Vanderbilt is studying low iron levels and how that relates to sleep. You might ask the pediatrician to check your child's iron levels.

SCREENS are an issue with sleep. Read more HERE.

SENSORY: A couple of years ago, I attended a two-day HANDLE Program training. I was completely new to this program, and I have to admit, I learned a lot of new ideas. Having done sensory integration therapy with a child on the autism spectrum for going on 8 years, I thought I was pretty "up to speed" as a mom. But HANDLE gave me a perspective I had not considered, and we have begun to introduce a couple of the activities, and am considering an assessment by a HANDLE professional.

We spent two days studying the neurology of the senses. I can't remember when I've looked at drawings of the brain that much! An emphasis on proper nutrition and dietary contributions to behavior was included in the presentation. Very biomed/MAPs! friendly. A neurodevelomental perspective, too.

During my two-day HANDLE training, I learned that one sensory related issue may be related to another sensory issue. For example, I've heard that when a person loses his sight, his hearing becomes more keen. In autism, when children are not using their eyes/vision to the fullest, then their hearing can become more sensitive. (we know our children are often not gathering non-verbal info from their vision-they aren't using their vision in a way that NT individuals do) However, individuals on the autism spectrum may use their eyes as a substitute for another SENSE.

A child with one underdeveloped sense, oh, say, proprioception, may indeed have an overdeveloped sense of hearing. Falling asleep may be challenging to a person who hears things that the rest of us tune out.

Individuals with asd often have little to no sense of proprioception, no sense of where they are in space, and they compensate for that lack of proprioception by using their vision to tell them where they are in space. One evidence of this idea is that sometimes our asd children have trouble falling asleep and staying asleep, because when they close their eyes, they're shutting off their most relied upon sense as a substitute for a lack of proprioception. In other words, when they shut their eyes, they lose the sense ofwhere they are. The issue is a problem with integration.

Many families report that their kids on the autism spectrum will fall asleep as long as Mom or Dad lies down with them as they fall asleep. Many report that when their children awake in the middle of the night, they aren't able to fall asleep alone - they need to be next to someone.

If you don't know where you are in space (proprioception) and you use your vision to tell you where you are, it makes sense that when you shut your eyes to try to fall asleep, you would need some sort of reference point to tell you where you are. Mom or Dad make a good reference point as you doze off to sleep. "I think; therefore I am." becomes, "I feel myself next to Mom or Dad when my eyes are shut; therefore I am...and I am able to fall asleep."

Thomas McKean, author of "Soon Will Come The Light", told us during a presentation that he sleeps surrounded by teddy bears, so that when he wakes in the night, he can press his back into one. I didn't understand that idea until the HANDLE two-day intro, but it makes sense that the teddy bears tell him where he is. Some families swear by expensive weighted sensory blankets at bedtime - now I know why they work. There are a lot of ideas that I would not try with a toddler or young child - we didn't introduce pillows until our kids were older. A body pillow to wrap arms around and/or a heavy all cotton blanket or quilt (watch the clearance aisles at Marshalls and TJMaxx) may be enough if for an older child who is waking and not knowing where he is in space when his eyes are closed. (There are always safety considerations to think about: Ask your pediatrician if your child is old enough for pillows - I am not a doctor and do not play one on my blog. Do your own research and make decisions based on your specific situation.) I know of some parents who swear by a fun tent that is made for a twin bed; their kids w/ autism began sleeping better in a tent. (I'm not sure about flame retardant chemicals in the tents; I chose not to try a tent at my house.) I know one child who began to sleep though the night when he inherited a bunk bed and he began sleeping in the bottom bunk. I suspect that the closed-in space provided by the tent or top bunk helps these individuals know where they are.

A HANDLE practitioner can assess your child and offer activities to help with sensory integration. We learned at the HANDLE two-day that some folks use another sense to help kids know where they are in space when they shut their eyes. A small lamp or nightlight is one way (although there are studies that show that lighting at bedtime is not healthy). Soft music is one way. A noise machine or fan for white noise is another. At our HANDLE two-day, use of scent was suggested (lavender). I've never tried scent (I don't like to smell scents when I'm sleeping). There are always safety considerations to think about: If your child likes to play with cords, you'll have to find battery operated options. If your child is a climber, then bunk beds and tents would be out, in my opinion. Very young children don't get pillows. Do your research, assess risks, keep safety in the forefront, have your doctor help you make decisions.

Judith Bluestone also recommends natural fabrics. She saw big differences in clients with the removal of carpeting from a home. Check the child's bedding; make sure it's natural. Cotton feels good. Poly and fleece may be itchy to some individuals.

I highly recommend Judith Bluestone's book, "The Fabric of Autism", even if your child has some diagnosis other than autism. She explains sensory neurology better than anyone I've seen or read.

NEW: Bill Nason's post about sleep is here.   
https://www.facebook.com/autismdiscussionpage/posts/1130255793720586

NEW: Dr Beth Malow, a neurologist, has a webinar about sleep online here:
https://iancommunity.org/ssc/webinar-sleep-challenges-autism
Learn about sleep studies and more with Dr Malow. Always rule out the medical causes first.

NEW: A Special Needs Guide to Bedtime by Karen Wang

NEW:  Sleep Tip: Red Lights

NEW: http://special-ism.com/calm-your-childs-brain-to-foster-healthy-sleep/ 


And if you have any tips or hints to share about helping your children on the autism spectrum fall asleep and stay asleep, please share them in the comments section.

I am not a doctor; I do not play one on this blog. Do your own research into all the safety aspects, consult with your pediatrician, your autism specialists, before you even consider one of the ideas. Find a doctor who can help diagnose properly and treat, if needed. Don't try treatments on your own.

Pedro's Whale

Autism and inclusion expert Paula Kluth, with Patrick Schwarz and illustrator Justin Canha bring us an important book for children, Pedro's Whale. Pedro is a little boy on the autism spectrum who has a special interest in whales. I identify with Pedro; I love cetaceans, too. (I was a docent on whale watch boats during several whale watch seasons when we lived on the West Coast.)

Pedro's Whale is a wonderful story that helps children and adults understand the extreme attachment to a special interest that are common in individuals on the autism spectrum. The story helps readers understand ways in which we can all use those interests as a bridge to relationships and learning.

The illustations are really nice. Illustrator Justin Canha is a young man on the autism spectrum, and he does a beautiful job putting pictures to the story.

Pedro's Whale is based on a true story.

I attended a day-long workshop with Paula Kluth a couple of years ago; she mentioned a new book was about to be published, called, Just Give Him The Whale! I haven't read that book, but Kluth gave us some background during the conference. Apparently, at the beginning of a new school year, Pedro's teacher thought he was too big to carry a toy whale all day long and she would not let him have it. His affect and behavior changed drastically, and Kluth was called in to help with the situation. When she learned that his toy had been banned, his safety net, her answer was, simply, "Just Give Him The Whale!" And Kluth and Schwarz wrote a book for teachers (and parents and homeschooling families) about using those fascinations and special interests in education and relationships.

Pedro's Whale is the version for children, complete with a page of suggestions and hints for how to use the book with groups of children. It's a 26 page hardback book with a simple story that 'normalizes' special interests for typical children, a story that gives important insight and perspective taking about autism and special interests to typical peers in group (school, co-op, Sunday School, camp etc) settings. List price is $18.95.

Brookes Publishing sent me a copy of Pedro's Whale for review purposes. I am not paid for this review and am not obligated to provide a positive review.

You, Your Child, and "Special" Education, A Guide to Dealing With the System

Brookes Publishing gives us a new book about dealing with the system of special education: You, Your Child, and "Special" Education by Barbara Coyne Cutler with Sue Pratt.

A 294 page paperback, list priced at $25.95, You, Your Child, and "Special" Education is a revised edition of a previously published book.

I wish I'd had this when my homeschooler was in school. Authors Cutler and Pratt explain the child's rights, the parents' rights, some legal direction in keeping up with IDEA, info on writing an effective IEP, and offer guidance, direction, and advice on navigating the sometimes difficult emotional piece. Cutler and Pratt deal with relationships with teachers and school staff, too.

Primarily focused on public schoolers and special education, for homeschoolers, I found this on
page 186 , "A home schooled child is also entitled to related services."

If you are new to special education, I think you'll appreciate this book. Parents already on the pathway may find it useful, too.

Brookes Publishing sent me a review copy of You, Your Child, and "Special" Education, A Guide to Dealing with the System to review here on my blog. I am not paid for this review and am not obligated to provide a positive review.

Reaching Boys Teaching Boys, Strategies That Work--And Why

Sometimes, I get a surprise in the mail, a book I did not know was coming. Here's one of them: Reaching Boys, Teaching Boys by Michael Reichert and Richard Hawley.


One of my facebook friends is an educator in Pennsylvania who told me that a lot of our classroom education focuses on the way females tend to learn. I agree with her to a point. My experience is that a lot of classroom education focuses on the way teachers tended to have been taught, how teachers tend to learn. If you are a student who learns that way, you score high marks in school and are considered successful. If you need more project based learning, movement, learning in context, hands on, NOT sitting at a desk taking notes during a lecture, then students risk being considered a less-than learner and often are labeled lazy or a behavior problem. I really like this quote from page 230 of Reaching Boys, Teaching Boys, "Teachers who reflexively attribute all off-task behavior to attention deficits or behavioral problems may miss important signalsabout the effectiveness of any given lesson."

Reaching Boys, Teaching Boys offers readers evidence, anecdotes, strategies, activities that work with those kids, often boys, but not always, need something outside the "teacher as lecturer, deliverer of information" box.

I suspect that a lot of my blog readers who are parents and teachers to students (boys and girls) with unique learning needs will identify with a lot of the stories in this book and will gain insight and ideas from it. There are so many important points in the book that I can use with my girl - a lot of information, I already use and incorporate (Chapter 4, Motor Activity, for example; or Chapter 3, Lessons as Games). Some, know about and need to incoroporate more deliberately (Chapter 5, Role Play and Performance). Some of the lessons, we're on the path toward (Chapter 7, Teamwork and Competetion; Chapter 8, Personal Realization; Chapter 9, Novelty, Drama, and Surprise).

I like the emphasis on the importance of relationships in teaching students.

Rather than copy the TOC, I'll point you to it, HERE. Chapter 1 is available HERE. Reaching Boys, Teaching boys is a 264 page paperback list priced at $29.95.

Jossey-Bass, an Imprint of Wiley, sent me a copy of Reaching Boys, Teaching Boys by Michael Reichert and Richard Hawley so that I could have a copy to review. I am not paid for this review and am not obligated to provide a positive review.

Teaching Girls About Menstruation

A popular topic in circles of parents of girls with disabilities, particularly developmental disabilities, is menstruation. There are many parents who are raising little girls whose bodies are going to start having monthly periods whether comprehension and cognition has caught up or not. Can you imagine teaching a toddler how to self-care during a menstrual period??? Yes, it happens to young women whose bodies outgrew the rest of their development.

How on earth does a mom or teacher go about that? I'd rather avoid the whole subject, but that's not reality, is it?

One answer is to go about it the same way that moms of typically developing young ladies go about it. And I stumbled across a company that helps moms teach and show their daughters about a menstrual period, before and during it.

I learned about Dot Girls in a Kotex ad. I spent some time browsing the Dot Girls web site. Sisters Terri Goodwin and Kathy Pickus founded Dot Girls to help us parents out, to provide information and supplies for explaining and handling a first period. They have developed a neat little Dot Girl First Period Kit® and offer a little paperback by JoAnn Loulan and Bonnie Worthen, PERIOD. A Girl's Guide ($9.99 / 76 pages) for this very purpose.

I have purchased several books for and about girls entering adolescence. My homeschooler, a daughter who happens to be on the autism spectrum who is a pre-teen, happens to have a big sister who is a teenager, and as I look through the books I purchased for my older daughter, I'm not sure they're developmentally appropriate for my younger daughter who has developmental delays. The book Dot Girls sells intrigued me enough to contact them about the book and the kit. Kathy told me they hadn't thought about the community of users with developmental delays. (I wouldn't have had I not been in this situation.) They were happy to send me a book and a kit (although I had to wait for the new kit to come out in August).

PERIOD. A Girl's Guide is written to offer the facts about menstruation without discussing sex. Yes, it offers sketches of body parts. Yes, it discusses feelings, mood swings, body changes. Yes, it is aimed at typically developing girls, and yes, I will have to figure out as I go along where my daughter's understanding lies and where I have to add to or modify information. It is an excellent starting place (in my opinion) compared to the other books I've seen. For a young woman who is developmentally delayed academically, it is quite wordy and if your daughter is like mine, you may have to make some modifications to the text, rewrite it to simplify concepts, but it's one I feel comfortable handing to my daughter to look at, because it doesn't discuss sex ed (because I don't think she's ready for that, yet). It's excellent for my typically developing daughter, too (she has a few other books; she's ready for other content that she and I can discuss together).

The Dot Girls First Period Kit® ($19.99) is a perfect introduction to some of the products we girls use. It arrived swathed in beautiful pink tissue paper; I love that. Let's wrap all the menstruation stuff in a package that is a beautiful present! Dot Girls certainly helps mom create a positive atmosphere when talking about menstruation.

We received the pink pouch. It is so pretty and inviting; my homeschooler (on the autism spectrum) was interested in opening it to see what was inside, and the kit and the little booklet inside provided the perfect context to talk more with her about how her body is changing and that, at some point, she will begin to menstruate, and when she does, she'll use products like these. There are a few pads, a little heating pad (okay, it's really small), some wipes, some bags for disposing used pads.

We've been talking about periods more (on and off) for the past couple of months, since my book and later, my kit arrived. The kit has been an incredible visual, hands-on, in-context tool for us, and we get it out every so often and remove the items and put them back into the pouch and talk about them. She asks more questions each time. Having the kit gives us opportunities to discuss it over time, allowing her processing time that she needs. I'd brought up the subject before learning about Dot Girls, and I attempted to begin to explain a period, and found it challenging with a child who is often more like an early elementary schoolage girl than a preteen. She's going to bloom into a young woman whether her academics are caught up or not.

Recently, I started my period unexpectedly and headed to the bathroom in a hurry. Little Bit wanted to know why, and I told her, I think I started my period. And she got her kit for me, told me I could use some of her pads if I wanted. ;) How sweet!

Thank you, Dot Girls, for the absolutely wonderful and pretty tool, the kit, and the information, the book, to help me introduce periods to my girl who happens to be on the autism spectrum. Having all of the resources in one pretty package is so much better than a big ol' package of pads. You've given us a friendly resource that we continue to revisit together as my girl gets closer to adolescence.

Dot Girls has a facebook page here.

I received a Dot Girl First Period Kit® and a copy of PERIOD. A Girl's Guide at no cost to me so that I could review them here, on my blog. I received no money for this review and am not obligated to write a positive review.

Sweet Potato Casserole

If you're looking for a Thanksgiving dinner recipe for mashed sweet potatoes, what some folks refer to as sweet potato casserole or crustless sweet potato pie, here's mine:

http://notnewtoautism.blogspot.com/2009/06/sweet-potato-casserole.html