Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Bible Journaling Kit Guest Review

I was given the opportunity to review this Bible Journaling Kit from Ellie Claire, a division of Worthy Publishing Group. I am not (yet) a Bible journal-er, but my college kiddo is. She has some colored pencils, markers, and watercolors that she has been using since she got her journaling Bible in June. She was happy to test drive the kit and tell you about it.

The kit is a good beginner set, especially for a child or a solid addition to existing journaling tools. The pencil twists are sturdy, the stickers are something kids always love, and would be a solid tool for an individual with fine motor delays who'd rather use stickers than handwriting. (Go here to find five free printable coloring sheets and to enter to win one of five kits.)

The kit would make a nice Christmas gift, a thank you to a neighbor or teacher, birthday gift, or addition to your Bible journaling art supplies.

Here are my daughter's photos and comments:
The kit includes:
· 4 sheets of word stickers
· 4 sheets of alphabet stickers
· 24 tab stickers
· 8 colored pencil twists
· 1 journaling pen
· 1 pouch with adjustable strap to fit Bibles of all sizes
· 1 ruled page protector mat with tracing lines 
(the Bible in the photographs below belongs to my daughter and does not come with the kit)

The kits are available for purchase for approximately $20 at these locations

My girl says the case is cute, and while supposed to be big enough to hold a Bible, is too small for her Bible. She is using the case to hold her journaling supplies.
She says the colored pencils mark a bit light, but they're good for background work and shading and stuff and they compliment her other journaling tools well.
The tracing tool and the pen are her favorite items from the kit. She does not use stickers in her Bible, and while she says they are nice quality, she has not used them.





My daughter is enjoying Bible journaling. It allows her to illustrate verses that helps her keep them in her memory. This kit is a welcome addition to her supplies. I hope you enjoy it, too

Penny

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Mom's Hummingbirds

My homeschooler and I spent Labor Day at my mother's house.

When I was there in May, Mom showed me a nest in one of her ferns. And we were surprised to see a cowbird egg alongside four other eggs. We got rid of the cowbird egg.

My mom has quite a few hummingbird feeders, which have paid off with lots of hummingbirds. I wanted to take some pictures of them. They know my mother. When she comes outside, they flock to her feeders and come close to her, clearly comfortable with her.

When I was outside, alone, the few that were willing to come toward me (not close to me in the way they come close to my mom) observed me from a distance. Sitting...
Or mid air... 
We have spent some time reading about cowbirds because of the egg we found in the nest in May. Now, we can spend some time reading about hummingbirds.

Monday, August 8, 2016

Left Out

Friday night and Saturday, my social media feed was overloaded with posts from a local conference for Christian women. Even folks from my hometown, which is two-and-a-half-hours away were here for the conference. I would have loved to have gone to the conference, but did not want to go alone. Drive alone. Find a place to park. Walk alone. Sit alone.

So many of you attended the event together in big groups. I saw the photos.

I don't have a group. I am a caregiver.

Church women, if there is a caregiver among you, a caregiver who does not get to be actively involved with you at church, a caregiver whose attendance is sporadic at best, please invite that caregiver to events, to ride with you, walk with you, sit with you.

Caregiving is isolating. We may look uninvolved because we aren't committed to church and Sunday School. But we are uninvolved because we are committed to a family member with special needs instead.

Remember us.

Please.

Penny

Sunday, July 10, 2016

Why My Daughter Hates "Brave"

My daughter wrote,
"I hate "Brave" because Elinor acts like a baby. She acts like she knows everything but not about being a mom. She acts like a toddler when she gets angry and she throws her own daughter's bow in the fireplace! Who does that???? Well, there you go. I HATE "BRAVE"!!!! 

PS: Mom's letter is here.

Friday, July 8, 2016

The Life We Never Expected Review

Expectations. Mine have been shattered over and over. Shattered expectations at church carry the deepest hurt, cause the most painful wounds. I have to remind myself that Christians are human and they are not God. When humans are not good ministers to families like mine (with a child with autism who has lots of co-occurring conditions), it reflects on them, not on God. I have to keep reminding myself of this.

I struggle with the difference between what is and what should be, continuing to reach what should be. The battle is real.

Authors Andrew and Rachel Wilson are parents of two children with special needs. They are Christians. And they wrestle with the same opponents that I do. Expectations. What Should Be. What Is. The biggest battle is the one happening in my head. And they, like me, make progress and then regress, back and forth. They understand.

The Wilsons arranged the chapters of "The Life We Never Expected" in five sections: weeping, worshiping, waiting, witnessing, breathe. Rachel writes some of the sections and Andrew writes some of them.

I always hold my breath a little bit when I read a book by Christian parents of a child or children with special needs. I have a lot of pain and grief, and I know my God can handle my pain and my grief, my negative emotions. I don't want to be criticized for having negative feelings or for admitting the emotions that are ugly. I do not want to be preached at in a holier-than-thou way. I want to be understood.

And the Wilsons understand. The book is loving, not preachy. Real, not rosy. I love that they reference the Psalms so much in the book. Sometimes, I think I spend too much time reading the angry Psalms, but it is there that I see myself and it is there that I am understood. I know I can't spend all my time there, and yet, being there, hearing the Psalmist's cries, is comforting, because I am not alone.

The Wilsons clearly have more skin friend and family support than we do. We have zero.
"These days, we can't even get through the day without the church, let alone save the world. We are totally dependent on a community of people--people who help, encourage, pray, serve, take responsibility--to be fruitful in any way at all." Andrew writes on page 47
and 
"Something especially bad happens, you hit a new low, and you cry out for help from y our friends and family, who rally around to help in a short, intense, and irreplaceable way."  Andrew writes on page 63.
They have live in support and a set of grandparents who help once a week. Yeah, we don't have that. Family is 150 miles away (which is better than the 600+ it was for many years) and we have not been able to build a network of support in this town where we moved five years ago. We stopped going to church because the obstacles were too great.


I still struggle with comparisons. I am a work in progress.I am trying not to turn the book's anecdotes into a pity party. And in this book, the Wilsons give me solid, doable, practical suggestions on how not to become a pity party.

The book retails for $8.82 on Amazon at the moment I am typing, is 152 pages short, yet the material is solid and useful. The book is physically small enough to fit inside my purse if I want to read it in a waiting area while my child is in a class or lesson.

There are two sections that really jump out and grab me right now, where I am. One is written by Rachel and one is written by Andrew. Rachel's reminder that my first thought, my first reaction to a situation or event is often not to be trusted touched me deeply. It is something I have learned about myself but have never articulated, and Rachel articulated for me in a section about finding joy. I needed that. I strongly identify with Andrew's section on prayer at this moment in time.

 I suspect this book will be one that I return to again and again and a different section will speak to me each time, depending upon where I am in that moment. I tend to identify with Rachel in a big way and not as much with Andrew. I wonder if my husband reads the book if he will identify more with Andrew? More books seem to be written to the moms and this one is geared to both the mom and the dad.

"The Life We Never Expected" by Andrew & Rachel Wilson is a wonderful resource for a family with a child or children with special needs.

PS: Andrew & Rachel: I have 15 years of notes about sleep and autism in one long blog post here if you are interested. Maybe something in it will be helpful at your house.
"Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”):  I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.

Friday, June 10, 2016

A Safe Place

Dear Autism Theater Program Director,

You have a PhD and "expertise"in emotional regulation in autism, yet your technique to assist my daughter in calming down was to shove her into a chair and whisper yell to her to "get control". You poured gasoline onto her fire and pushed her headfirst into meltdown mode.

She needed a full year after the damage you did before she would try another theater program.

Today, in a theater camp for typically developing kids, she was on stage for the third production since the mistake that was your "program" two years ago. Was her week without any bumps or rough spots? No. However, with no one around to treat her as if she is autistic, no one to shove her into a chair and threaten her, with no one to provoke her into a meltdown, and instead, surrounded by people who are reassuring, people who treat her anxiety with care and respect, she flourished.
My girl grew a LOT off stage this week, working through frustration and anxiety, and I am so grateful to the two musical theater camp directors who provide this safe place for her to learn and grow and to get some musical theater experience at the same time.

I love to see her perform on stage. She was a very amazing hummingbird today.




PS to the PhD at the autism theater program: I am still waiting for your call to check on my daughter. You said you'd call me tomorrow. That was two years ago.

Monday, May 30, 2016

Mother & Son, The Respect Effect


http://loveandrespect.info/mother-and-son-the-respect-effect/
I had an opportunity to review Emerson Eggerichs' new book.

As I read, Mother & Son, The Respect Effect by Emerson Eggerichs, PhD, I feel as if I am looking in a mirror. I suppose that I expected a one sided book about how males are, and instead, Eggerichs gives me quite a lot of information about how females are in contrast to how males are.

Eggericks teaches me that "Love-talk is the mother tongue of mothers." Yet, our boys' first language is that of respect. My entire framework, the lens through which I view life, is a lens of love and relationship. The men in my family view life through the lens and framework of respect. And love and respect are very different.

Hint: Appendix A at the back of the book is a quick start guide and I wish I had discovered it first as an overview. :) 

I recognize that my daughters are very different from my son, and I have wildly different relationships with each. I know that girls are different from boys in the way we process information and approach relationships, but I have never been able to define or qualify what makes interaction with my son so different. And in the first chapter, Eggerichs has me hooked. A-ha moment after a-ha moment. More than a little overwhelmed. A lot of the information applies to my relationship with my husband, too. I am convicted with a desire to change. I wish I had had this book a decade ago.

Eggerichs recognizes that this language of respect is not a mother's first language, and he reminds the reader that it is okay for this language of respect, this filter of respect, to not feel natural to a woman when her interaction filter is love. Eggerichs also reminds us that the differences are differences, not issues or right and wrong ways of communicating. He addresses a mother's resistance and the questions she might have in an entire chapter (chapter eleven).

There is so much to like about this book. Chapter 3, "A Game Plan" is about being a guide. RDI families who are familiar with guided participation in autism intervention will really appreciate this chapter. Eggerichs gives readers an acronym from GUIDES and helps us apply the concepts (along with the concepts in chapter four) throughout the book with lots of practical examples. (RDIers will love the examples of declarative statements.)

Eggerich's observation that many mothers say their boys ask, "Can we stop talking now?" is reassuring. It's not just me.

What if the son doesn't behave in a way that he deserves respect? Oh yes, Eggerichs addresses it here.

I know that some of my readers are secular homeschoolers who tend to be very selective before using a Christian resource, and from that viewpoint, Eggerichs does reference related scripture to provide a foundation and to illustrate his points, and yet it is not in an 'in your face', holier than thou, preachy kind of way. If you are not a Christian, you will find the material in the book helpful for parenting a child of the opposite gender. (Yes, there is enough info here for men to have some understanding of their daughters even though the focus is on moms with their sons.)

I urge you to go to http://loveandrespect.info/mother-and-son-the-respect-effect/ and watch the videos that Dr Eggerichs has produced for us. Scroll to the bottom and get the first three chapters free.

Love and Respect's facebook page is here.
The blog is here.

I am so glad I got the opportunity to review Mother & Son. I hope that I am able to take the information in it and make course corrections in myself that make for a stronger bond between the men in my life and me.

Penny

"Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”):  I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.








Saturday, May 14, 2016

The LEAGUE and the LANTERN Review

https://leagueandlantern.com/
My homeschooler and I received a copy of "The League and the Lantern" to review. I always want to qualify the fact that I am reviewing from a special needs perspective. I am homeschooling a teenager who is on the autism spectrum. She has academic delays and we use materials meant for children who are younger than she is. She has been a reluctant reader in the past and will refuse to read if the book looks too difficult with too small print, too many words on a page. We review books as read alouds. My daughter has an unusual rule that she reads just four pages at a time and she will stop reading in the middle of a good part of the story if her four pages are up, which means we are not even halfway into the story. Part of the issue is that I stop her sometimes to check for meaing. When the character shuffles through a dark tunnel, does she know what "shuffles" means? Can she imagine not being able to see where she's going after an explosion? Does she realize that stumbling upon the "lifeless eyes of the redheaded security guard" means they found a dead body?

I am trying to work on her flexibility and occasionally can get her to read a little bit more, but often she tells me I have to wait to hear what comes next. There has not been a read aloud yet that she has gotten lost in enough to keep reading through the story and that is probably an autism thing. 
From an autism perspective or a special needs perspective, the chapters are relatively short. Visually, a lot of children would be able to finish a chapter of The League and the Lantern in one sitting (as opposed to reading four pages at a time). I do like how author Brian Wells made the chapters short. Now to convince the girl to read a chapter at a time rather than four pages. Easier said than done.

I knew this book was going to teach us a lot of interesting stuff when I read "heterochromia iridum" on page 4 in a description of one of the characters. When Wells mentions a matchbox, I wonder if any of my children have ever seen a box of matches and if they found one in the dark if they would know what it is? These are the kinds of stories I like, because they teach my daughter something as we figure out what new terms or unusual words mean. There are 140 key vocabulary words sprinkled in the text with historic sites offering more learning opportunities.

If you have quick access to the internet while you're reading together, you can look up terms together. What is "commando crawling"? You can show your child a video demonstration. There is much to learn here.

The book web site, btw, is packed with fun stuff. The bonus material is especially fun (I think of it as "value added" to the story).

More added value is the fact that the by buying one book, you participate in a  buy one - give one campaign to get books into the hands of kids who cannot afford their own copies. List price of this 282 page hardbook is $17.99.


Since we haven't finished with the book yet, I'll borrow the synopsis from the publicity materials:
The League and the Lantern is the first book in a new adventure series for middle-school readers. It all starts when a dangerous organization invades Jake Herndon’s seventh-grade sleepover. He escapes along with two new classmates, Lucy and TJ, only to face a 48-hour fight for survival on the streets of Chicago. The kids unravel a mystery dating back to the Civil War, and an incredible secret about Jake’s family. Along the way they learn unexpected lessons about courage, family and friendship.
We live in an area of the country where Civil War battles were fought (and lost) and we keep adding to our knowledge about the war. The League and the Lantern is interesting to us because of the Civil War history. (The bonus features on the book web site take us to more history.) I get a little more nerdy about Civil War history all the time and the tidbits in this adventure add more to my nerd factor.

Caution: The book is a thriller, and some of the story may scare some sensitive children. I would not have liked it as a child. I have children who loved this type of material.

The book is 'clean', no cursing, no dating relationships. Wells's storytelling is inviting, and as I read ahead of where my daughter and I are in our read-aloud, I want to keep going at the end of each chapter. Learning that author Brian Wells is employed in network television comes as no surprise. He knows how weave a tale. Honestly, I am concerned that my girl will miss a lot of the meaning in the story at this point because of her delays (a heads up for those of you whose children w special needs struggle with reading), however, I am enjoying how the story plays out. I wish the series had been available when my kids were little. They would have loved this.

Thank you, Brian Wells, for the autographed and numbered copy of the book!

"Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”): Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.

Wednesday, April 6, 2016

A Troubled Child

Today, I read this note from a parent in a group on Facebook. It is such a gem I asked that parent if I could share it here on my blog. The parent graciously said yes. And if you have not yet read "Lost At School" by Ross Greene, PhD, I highly recommend it, as it is about the skills mentioned below.
Last night my child told the therapist "I am a 'troubled' child." And the therapist looked at my child and said "You are not "troubled", you are here to learn skills, there is nothing wrong with you." And my child said "Other kids already have these skills." And she said "some kids need help learning to read, or with math, and everyone learns at a different pace and gets help when and where they need it."
 So much better than the old therapist who told me my child was just being manipulative and needed harsher consequences.

Sunday, April 3, 2016

Under The Sea Holy Bible Review & Giveaway


Even though it is marketed to children ages 6-10, my teenage homeschooler with ASD and I are enjoying the Under The Sea Holy Bible from Zondervan (list price $24.99). You never know about Bibles for kids. Will it be cheesy? Silly? Inviting? You never know until you get to open it and use it.

As soon as I opened the package, I find a sensory perk. The front cover and book spine illustrations are textured. I like to run my fingers over them. I suspect sensory kiddos will enjoy that feature.

The New International Reader's Version is attractive to my daughter, who can be a reluctant reader. Too much text on a page and she sometimes shuts down. The NIrV is designed to be very easy to understand. I gave my daughter the Under The Sea Holy Bible and told her we get to review it and the next thing I knew (same evening) she came to me and told me she read the first 12 chapters and she narrated aloud what she'd read. I am impressed.

A lot of stories and concepts about religion and from the Bible are difficult for children and sometimes for individuals on the autism spectrum. I continue to search for resources that are inviting and fun for my daughter with ASD. One feature of the Under the Sea Holy Bible is that it makes some difficult concepts easier to understand. See the Ten Commandments to the left as one example.

I like the page that spotlights children in the Bible in a sort of scavenger hunt style where the clue peaks curiosity and sends the child looking for the answer if she doesn't already know the answer.

The Under The Sea Bible has six of these colorful, illustrated pages that outline a topic or concept. There's even a page that outlines the ABCs of becoming a Christian. (Admit Believe Confess).

The NIrV is easy to understand and I suspect it may become my daughter's preferred version. We have enjoyed having this item to review

The hardback is available at Barnes & Noble, Walmart, and Family Christian Stores.

You can follow Zondervan on Facebook and Twitter.



"Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”): Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.
 Only one entrant per mailing address, per giveaway. If you have won a prize from our sponsor Propeller / FlyBy Promotions in the last 30 days, you are not eligible to win. If you have won the same prize on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification.”

I have a copy to give away to U.S. and Canadian readers. Just comment for an entry. I will choose a winner, Monday, April 11th, 2016. Please comment to enter!
 
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