Rules

My son is reading, "Rules", by Cynthia Lord. My older daughter read it a year or two ago, and I read it when she did. "Rules," is fiction written from the perspective of Catherine, an NT sibling of a boy on the autism spectrum.

NT = neurotypical. NT is a term that those of us who are touched by autism use to describe individuals who are typically developing and/or are not autistic.

Because her brother David does not understand many of the unspoken communication that the rest of us take for granted, Catherine gives David rules to help him understand what to do or what not to do in specific situations. "If the bathroom door is closed, knock!"

"Rules" is a great book, especially for siblings of individuals with autism.

"Rules" got me thinking about my own rules. I have a few:

One of my own rules is that generally, I don't read other product reviews until I've written my own review for that product.

I do not drive to a therapy where the drive time is longer than the actual time in therapy. Parents of children on the autism spectrum could spend every day, all day long, in a vehicle and a waiting room, while the child w/ ASD is in some therapy. Don't get me wrong, I would not withhold a medically necessary treatment. But I'd rather interact at home with professionals who support me at home instead of spending my days driving from therapy to therapy and waiting room to waiting room.

Whenever possible, I avoid making siblings to spend a lot of time in waiting rooms while the sister on the autism spectrum is in a therapy. (Sometimes their waiting is unavoidable, but I do try.)

In helping another family new to a diagnosis of autism, never do more work than the other parent is willing to do. I am often asked to talk to a family member of a friend (or a friend of a friend) about autism. I'm happy to mentor a newbie through the GFCF diet or manage the maze of therapies and options out there, but I will not "cold call" the friend or gather a bunch of information to give to someone who hasn't directly asked me for it.

I try not to let the fuel gauge on my van drop below half a tank. (I have several reasons for this. When we lived in Los Angeles, twice I was caught on "E" and had trouble buying gas -- once, during the Northridge quake and once in the riots that followed the trial of the police officers who beat Rodney King, and in the midwest, during the four-day blackout caused by a grid failure, I was also on "E", not having enough gas to get to a gas station to drive me and my kids to a town with power. You'd think I'd have learned my lesson in Los Angeles! Additionally, in the midwest, in near-zero temps with snow, filling that half-tank is quicker and means I don't have to be outside in the elements as long!)

What are some of your rules?